


Sandcastles

by TSerpillum



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Childhood Memories, F/M, First Crush, Training
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-15
Updated: 2018-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-19 04:08:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13696572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TSerpillum/pseuds/TSerpillum
Summary: She often sees them. All her peers playing cheerfully, muddying their clothing in carelessness that was allowed to them, a precious gift in her eyes. Annie watches them from afar, the longing unmasked in the child she was forced to cease being. Never a part of them, never a part of anything.A loner isn’t born, it’s made with careful and persistent work, just like the object the little hands of the village children made.Sandcastles.





	Sandcastles

_She often sees them. All her peers playing cheerfully, muddying their clothing in carelessness that was allowed to them, a precious gift in her eyes. Annie watches them from afar, the longing unmasked in the child she was forced to cease being. Never a part of them, never a part of anything._

_A loner isn’t born, it’s made with careful and persistent work, just like the object the little hands of the village children made._

_Sandcastles._

 

* * *

 

_It’s silly to be excited about a new morning after a night of barely any sleep_. 

She remembers her dads words as the blond tresses find their usual place in the bun created with the beginning of her training.  _Without a good night’s rest, you won’t be able to fulfill your mission, Annie._

The unreadable blue of her eyes darkens, the tints of sadness visible in the mirror which many trainees faced until now. But it’s okay, she’s alone, so for a moment she can let the inner confusion arise to the surface, display its facets on the pale canvas her face made, and steal a few seconds to be a young girl and forget the mission she has to carry out.

Yet there’s no backing off now. The weakness she has to endure may not change anything. Although her path brought sparks of joy she never counted on, Annie made a promise she won’t break.

The bitter taste of remorse slides down her throat as she walks out.

The warm sun rays sweep over the rocky training ground, marking the beginning of another of those hand to hand combat rounds she found senseless. Until recently, that is. Using her height to her advantage, she sneaked around the crowd of taller soldiers, pale blue orbs searching eagerly under the cover of blonde bangs.

 

* * *

 

_“Anyway, what’d you think of my kick?” he beamed excitedly. “I was just imitating what you did, but it worked perfectly!”_

_The little laugh he let out softened her judgment over his poor attempt at using her technique._

_“It sucked. Not even close.”_

_Though her words appeared harsh, her tone didn’t contain even the half of it. However his disappointment was evident in the immediate downturn of his slightly parted lips._

_“Seriously? What was wrong with it?”  Eren looked like a child whose sandcastle was mercilessly stomped to the ground by the one he built it for._

_“If you like it that much…”_

_Involuntarily her gaze turned to the dusty ground to the sides of her feet, the idea in her mind coming to form, to carefully break the barrier of her lips and roll down her tongue into freedom._

_“…I wouldn’t mind teaching it to you.”_

_A little too hopeful, much more stupid, that’s what she sounded like to herself._

_“Huh? No thanks!” he rejected her openly “It really hurts…” he hesitantly began, giving her the needed opening._

_“Oh please, I insist.”_

_She honestly did._

 

* * *

 

Grain for grain, moment after moment they spent together training, a sandcastle slowly got its outlines in her mind, so strikingly similar to the one she always wished to build as a child, but never got the chance to.  _The training is time consuming, the schedule must be held onto_ , her dad reminded her everytime she longingly gazed to other children who had full right to play and enjoy their childhood. A peculiar feeling to combine those two on an enemy’s ground. 

Never understood and never seen as she truly was, Annie encountered something completely new to her. She couldn’t sleep and her mind was flooded with images of their moments spent together, the sound of his laughter and his gratitude over the acknowledging of his improvement.

Still a bit sleep tousled, the wild hair unkempt and free, Eren stands beside Armin, who smilingly motions to her. Her breath stills in her lungs the moment his head turns towards her, his sleepy face lighting up to greet her. 

“I was waiting!” he says, immediately taking his position for combat.

It’s safe to approach, she knows and exhales finally at ease. He invited her, wants to have her for himself,  _she hopes_ , ignoring Mikasas glare the majority of the trainees feared. 

“No, you’re just yawning.” she challenges, savoring the image in front of her, her first little sandcastle ever. Built on enemy’s ground, over the technique her father painfully taught her, over everything she was unsuccessfully brainwashed to hate, something precious unfolded. This is the most she can get, Annie is aware of it, embracing it even more.

In the end, Eren is on the ground as so many times before. 

“Loser!” Jean calls him out, side eyeing Mikasa whose attention Annie is aware of. It feels cold, a freezing tingling on her skin which only strengthens the grain of hope she hides all too well.

“One day I’ll make you proud!” Eren voices a promise from the ground, completely ignorant of Jeans comment, locking eyes with her a moment longer than necessary. Then there’s a blush spreading on his cheeks and he hastily jumps up to his feet.

How stupid and silly he is.

So beautifully silly and stupid.

Her fingers move her bangs over her right ear as she looks away in embarrassment. 

“Silly.” she whispers, and he is off again, running towards Armin whose shoulders shrug an apology with a knowing smile. 

The taste of remorse spreads in her mouth as she stands there, close to them yet the access denied. 

The female titan stomps violently on her and Erens sandcastle, destroying in a heartbeat what they built for months. 

It the end, she won’t even have a daydream as a hideaway.

**Author's Note:**

> Ereani written as a Valentines Day special, requested by aanimesoull on tumblr.  
> I hope you had a nice Valentines Day as well, with lots of chocolate and love. :)


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